Knows Those Nose Hairs | KKUURRTT

Inside and out, but preferably kept away from others. This is more socially acceptable than the alternative. Short brutish bristles extending well past the edge of the nostril, nearly long enough to utilize in the brushing of one’s teeth. Save that $2.99 every six months.

Surgical process to remove the cheekbones so that one may fold their face in half and clean (at least the bottom row) with what the lord hath giveth. Bit of trouble reaching those back molars but it’s all about a really good dental plan nowadays anyways. Once a month by a professional instead of twice a day by oneself truly comes to about the same standpoint. There is a counterpoint, but enough dentists agree that they don’t bother with it anymore. 6/10 at least.

Tried those trimmers mow-the-lawn upside down, but broke upon impact, whirring blades caught on the thick ropes hanging like stalactites, crystal encrusted but instead of precious gems it’s dried mucus and hardened into something it’s better not messing around with. Give or take the snot but this is the ride of a lifetime and they’re not about to let go because of wishes made to goblins.

Grant passage for finger pick. Navigating through the brush as only Jungle explorers are fully qualified for. Find some solid gold and bring it to one of those 1-800-CASH-4-GOLD spots where they’ll offer nothing in return for the find of a century. Return to whence it came.

Only one solitary hair and pull on it to find out what hurts so good. Is this kink? Think about wearing a mask with only the nose exposed, picking one by one until nothing remains. Ask partner after partner but none will comply, so at best it becomes a sort of masturbatory sadomasochism.

Nothing left to do but to admit defeat, bridge the gap between nose and moustache as if there never was a distinction to begin with.

KKUURRTT is glad you read his thing.

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